i am neurotic.

I will only drink coffee with a straw. I am terrified the coffee will stain my teeth and I take great pride in my pearly whites.

I cannot sit in a relaxed, reclined, or supine position without bringing the neck of my shirt (or blanket or sheet or throw pillow) up into my mouth. When I am speaking with someone, I either keep it in my mouth or hold it just beneath my bottom lip. I am so afraid that the person I am speaking with will focus on what may or may not be a double chin, regardless of how well we know one another.

I used to wear t-shirts to bed all the time until i got a fuzzy blanket.  now i can’t go to sleep without taking my shirt off and i can’t sleep half naked without taking a shower first.

When I play solitaire I have to put the hearts and diamonds between the clubs and spades. I think the spades and clubs are guys and will fight unless I put the female hearts and diamonds between them.

when i go on vacations or trips, i can’t unpack my bags because i am too afraid i will lose something.

When eating Rice Krispies, I have to submerge every “krisp” in milk before I can eat them. They don’t have to stay submerged, but every one must be wet before I can have breakfast.

I cannot stand it when there are loose hairs on the floor. I have to wear slippers at all times just in case. Socks are a no go, because they stick to socks and when they go in the wash, the hair transfers to other pieces of my clothing. I will even run from my closet on one side of my room where I keep my slippers to my just to make sure I get the least amount of hairs on my feet as possible. I will then give my feet a quick wipe just before I put my feet on the bed to make sure.

I cannot go number two if someone can hear. I turn the faucet on if i can or i sing until i’m done.

When I’m eating food, drinking anything, just consuming anything in general, I have to be thinking positive thoughts, if not then whatever I’m eating or drinking could ruin my body.

Ever since the Staph outbreak, I learned that you should wash your hands for at least 20 seconds. This made me paranoid and now I have to wash my hands like so: I get at least 4 pumps of soap, wash for 20 seconds and then get 5 paper towels, grabbing each with alternating hands, because 4×5=20.