i am neurotic.

Every time I think about cutting something I cut my fingers off in my mind.  I can’t seem to think about cutting anything no matter how hard I try without cutting my fingers.  I’ve never cut my fingers.

If I walk through in a door, I have to use the same door to exit it. I feel as if I were in a different dimension. I’ve felt this way since I’ve turn about 5.

Whenever I see or think about toe nail clippers, I imagine someone using them on my two front teeth to crack them apart and it makes my teeth “hurt”.

Every time I see someone chopping veggies, specially at a high speed, I can see all their fingers getting chopped off. It freaks me out and I’m amazed (and relieved!) how it hasn’t yet happened.

i cannot walk down stairs or escalator without experiencing a vision of myself falling down them, knocking all my teeth out.

i am completely repulsed by buttons. the worst kind are the clear plastic ones with 2 holes in the middle. i never wear them, and if someone else is i have to look away. it’s especially bad if i’m eating – i imagine the buttons in my mouth, vomiting up huge waves of them. i cannot bear hearing them clink as they go around the tumble dryer. it’s led to a phobia of thrift/second hand stores, as buttons on old clothes are the worst.

I cannot watch anyone shave, especially on TV.  Not even cartoon characters, like Homer Simpson.  I always think about what it would feel like to get cut by a  razor blade, and gush blood everywhere.

You know how you can sometimes smell a familiar but misplaced aroma? Like maybe the smell of bacon while you’re out driving in the country? Every time that happens to me, I think that I’m really in a coma lying in a hospital bed and the aromas that I smell are really the result of the doctors waving the source of that particular smell under my nose in order to get some type of reaction to prove that I’m still alive.

If I see a bug in my house, I can’t sleep at night. I mummify myself in my blankets so nothing can get in (even if it’s already sweltering in my room), then wake up throughout the night to crawling sensations all over my skin. Also any piece of lint or fuzz immediately starts to look a spider.

When riding in a car on the highway, I feel compelled to imagine a ball bouncing over each telephone/electrical pole in succession. Uneven spacing is a serious problem, as the imagined ball is sort of sluggish. This will go on until I start grinding my teeth and eventually force myself to stop.